How to Pick Up a Beautiful Woman

Relax. This is science, but not of the rocket variety. Don’t assume every pretty girl is mean, spoken for, or dates often. The thing to remember is not to do what most men that approach her do, and that many men are too afraid to even try. It is sometimes best to make an observation about your immediate surroundings- the deejay, the traffic, the long checkout line, or someone in the crowd. If you can be witty without appearing to hit on her, you’ll establish your sense of humor.

This may sound like a no brainer, but don’t stare below her neck. Make good, but not creepy eye contact, and speak with meaning and purpose. Do not compliment her on physical attributes- leave her guessing. Smile as often as appropriate, and don’t dwell on topics such as career. Ask her opinion about the things you’re discussing, and listen for cues as to her outlook on life. When she makes a funny, punctuate your laugh with a light tap on her wrist or a soft playful one on her shoulder, as if by reflex. When the mood is relaxed, when she asks more personal questions, imply in a teasing manner that she is hitting on you. If she mentions a boyfriend in passing (never ask, BTW), don’t address the issue directly. Play off questions about your relationship status as interest on her part (not that they aren’t).

If there are others about, such as her friends, yours, service persons or bar/wait staff, or strangers, treat them with class. You should do this anyway, so it feels and looks natural. This is one way to demonstrate high social value. Another is to speak more of goals and ambition than profession. Again, this has to be sincere, not something said to get some panties. By the same token, don’t agree with her opinions and such just to impress her. It’s phony, insecure, and doesn’t say “I’m my own man.”

Keep it brief. She’s either going to sex you or she’s not, so employ an economy of words. Once you feel a good bond, offer to pick this conversation up another time, or to bounce to another, quieter locale. The first should be done if you’re not trying to score then and there, the latter if you wish to escalate to at least kissing. You’ll know where you stand by the way she responds to your ruminations (agrees, laughs, is very attentive), her body language (maintains eye contact, leans forward, smooths dress or adjusts hair), and other nonverbals. This is why it is so important to touch-test when you laugh. If you watch women talk to each other, they touch far more than men do, and they avert their eyes less often. If you end her walking her to her ride before changing locations, you’ll know a lot by how close she walks to you. If you two actually go for a walk, the same applies. She may even do something like hit the ladies room first, to “fix” her face.

If she likes you, and you sense it during a walk or after a bounce, you can do one of two things. If seated near to each other, you can place a hand atop one of hers. This is another tactile road sign of where things are headed. Don’t entwine the fingers, just casually rest it there without looking at her before you do so (don’t “telegraph” it- you want to note her reaction to the element of surprise, and gauge interest). If the coast is clear after this, ask if she’s a good kisser. And make that first one count- no gagging her with your tongue, or sloppy middle school stuff. Start slowly.

If you’re driving, walking or seated in a cab or such, her proximity will tell you what’s acceptable. Eventually you’ll either exit the mode of transportation, come to a red light, or if walking, stop to point out something interesting in the distance, the street or the sky. When you do so push one hand slowly toward her underhanded, offering your palm (don’t throw your arm over her shoulder). If she offers hers, hold the hand very lightly, continue chatting for a bit, then kiss close after a profound shared thought. Don’t hold hands after the kiss, unless you’re indoors seated on a sofa, and moving to another level. The ideal sofa close is to say something that causes her to turn toward you to answer, engage her eyes while she does so, and kiss her then. It’s generally better to prelude it by caressing a cheek so that there’s no mistaking the mood or intention.

These guidelines are not exact like a Yahoo! map, they’re a suggested course to stay near, while exercising your own judgement. The core of the lesson is to teach you to read reaction, make her comfortable, and keep the conversation light, humorous and sexy. If a woman digs you, you must be able to see the cues, so you’re not making moves on the wrong person. Confidence, an interesting life, and gentle introduction of touch will dictate the outcome- you will only respond to her subtle invitations. If you only get the digits the first encounter, and don’t enter a closure situation, employ the tactile tactics when you see her again.

Relax, relate and read, and you’ll be sucking plenty of pretty face.

ST

 

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