When is the Best Time to Approach Women?

Often I am asked, especially during private consultation, when should a guy step to pretty women? In other words, where, and under what circumstances should you try game? There are some basics. Always remember to ask yourself if you are in a situation where social capital can be demonstrated? Do you have a home field advantage (such as a bank, grocery store, restaurant, library, or car wash where you are well-known, and staff address you accordingly). This levels the playing field, and helps to equalize with her outstanding looks.

In these places there is no ostensible male competition, no one comes there to meet guys. Everything PullJoy must seem accidental- happenstance. When you approach, do so from the front, even if this means, in a store with aisles, you have to go down another aisle and come back to walk facing her as if you as just now seeing her. Don’t speak or say hello from her side or rear- give her the opportunity to face you. Do not follow her, unless you can do so from paralell to her aisle, or from across the street to then encounter her from the front (walk faster than she). When leaving a class or store, take a route that will put you in her path before she gets there, which will often mean walking quickly, then making a u turn as if you just happen to be coming her way. Then you came make your humorous observation about the parking, the long lines, the insane prices, the overrated movie.

Continuing on this theme, where you are merely making a remark and she was the one within earshot when the idea occurred to you- THIS IS IMPORTANT. You are not hitting on her, asking about phone numbers and boyfriends. You’re making a comment, which establishes your sense of humor, and that you are chill. This doesn’t raise her defenses. Then, sometime during the conversation, she’ll believe her answers and her personality caused you to discover that you like her. THIS WAS HAPPENSTANCE (after all, it was, you didn’t go there to check out girls, but books). Her ego will be fed by the conversion that took place under non-pressure circumstances. She’ll be attentive because there’s no nightclub activity, other guys walking about, or girlfriends to distract her. You faced her, and you smile when speaking.

Other ideal times to engage attractive women are places where social capital is assumed-which is why vacation and cruises are so full of potential. But where you live, think of banquets, fundraisers, award ceremonies, cultural/art openings to which you had to be invited. These environments are pre-screened, so that you have some built in societal standing. Besides, mingling is natural at these affairs. Maneuver into a situation facing her or her seat, and make a funny observation about the proceedings, or the length of time it is taking the caterers or banquet staff to bring on the dinner. Do so in a smiling, not critical or angry manner.

Once you have gotten her attention this way, whether it be in a mall, zoo, Kohl’s, or bookstore, tell her your name and ask hers, ask her (using her name) about her tastes and likes, or her opinion about a principle of life. Then you’ve got to go (after all, you are shopping)- can you two pick it up from here another time- even later that night. Get the digits.

Be up front, don’t creep up on women from the side or rear. Smile. Be brief. The more the social capital implicit, the better your chances.

ST

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4 responses to “When is the Best Time to Approach Women?

  1. “You’re making a comment, which establishes your sense of humor, and that you are chill. ” True! I am usually attracted to men who are chilled out and not sound like they are hitting on me 🙂

    How to Approach a Girl

  2. Thanks Sabina- and don’t be a stranger. It’s always helpful for me and readers to get female feedback.

    ST

  3. This is definitely a great way to approach a woman and start a conversation. The idea of this being accidental is a good as well, you just come off as an interesting person.

  4. Thanks AW:

    ST

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